Wednesday, July 27, 2005

here goes

So.

Just got out of a realllyyyyy hot bath - used as a muscle relaxer. Working 60ish hours a week aint no joke!

anyways, back to the purpose of this blog.

Yesterday was my feature at Monday Night Blues. May I just say that Charleston's literary scene has embraced me like none other, and as far as my art and writing life is concerned, I think I definitely chose the right place to be.

This poet guy, marcus, is in charge of Charleston's poet's webpage . He has been so graciously helping me get acclimated to the area, we have poetic rap sessions, and he will be the one to help me design Sage in the upcoming month (Look for a late September or Oct 31 release!). Anyways, so they hype me up, which is cool...telling everyone that i'm the "most talented, beautiful poet to grace the local poetry scene in a while." *blushes*.

Anyways. If you're interested, or know any of the poems, here's the set list. It was divided into two sections. I think I did somewhere near a full hour of just pure delana entertainment:

set moja (one, in swahili).

Back where I come from

My dream for the misbegotten

These hands

Teaching to fish

A meeting

Letters of consolation for the grieving, (pts I & II)

Vicious Cycles


Set mbili (two, in swahili)

Poetic Rhapsody

The water’s fine

Reality TV (behind the scenes)

Nightmares

Connectivity

To my grandmother

Yellow rose

Israelites




So, again, if you know many of my pieces, you'll know that a lot of these are 1) from my book, Sage and 2) Written on a page.
I tried to give a nice even mix of written and memorized pieces, but then I realized as i was performing that the first set was heavily written, where as the second, only the last two pieces were read from the page.

The performance of it all, however, i must say (and this is the part where i brush my own shoulders off) was pretty flawless. The room of about 30-40 people (at max, people of course, coming in and out) was totally silent, like, i could hear EVERYTHING goin on around me. Usually, if the poetry isn't too interesting, or the music, people will be at their tables chatting, or doing something. I looked around and saw everyone was just fixed on me. It made me wonder if they were just gazing out of boredom - i wondered if my set was too long. Ellie - the organizer, and person who scooped me up - said it was perfect. That i was phenomonal. lol, so i know this just may sound like i'm just tooting my own horn, but i guess it's sort of exciting to me, really. Like, this is part of the reason i came down here, to get my career off on the right foot, and there you have it.

the best part? working at a coffee shop, and seeing some people come in the next morning and sit down and talk to you about your work, and its impact, and i think it's wonderful to be able to connect with people who you would never connect to on any other level. He said he was a financial banker (older, white guy) and that he was "never exposed to those kind of things, but decided to check them out, to give him a chance to expand his mind" and said that i "raised the bar, and blew him out of the water." then we just talked about some of the subject matter i raised - single parenting (poems - to my grandmother, vicious cycles), charleston segregation (the water's fine) to just how he talked to one of the more respected poets who he said had the misforturne of reading right after me, and he was like he was still mesmerized and impressed by my work (both the poet and the guy) that he didn't feel right reading. (ironically, i remember, that's when the talking started back up again).

it was also cool to see some people in the audience that were moved by my open mic performances, and i told them about my feature, (and they're not regular attendees) and they showed up.

anyways. I'm excited. I'm starting a yahoo group as a mailing list-of-sorts to keep incontact with my audience members (and people i know) who will be interested in buying a book (or ten) and attending my book signing, i want to be able to keep in contact with them.

book signing: Ellie Davis demands I do a book signing. I wasn't going to push the issue, being that 1/2 of the stuff i read monday night (or have read at all at the open mics) have been pieces from Sage. So i didn't want it to be a repeat of Monday night, but then again, I guess I would like for people to become familiar with my work, have "favorites", make requests. Who knows. More details on that special night later (and Stacy, you BETTER not have excuses for that!).

Anyone want to feature a young, budding poet, let a sista know. As long as you're within driving distance, we're good.

here's to the writing life.

Friday, July 22, 2005

nothing left to say

so i've been frequenting my blog numerous times, trying to figure out exactly what to say as to what's been going on in my life since i last left you all a message.

i'm still at a loss for words. Life for me is getting a bit difficult, harder as each day goes on, and i realize the impact every single decision has on your life. Then i think about religion, and the idea that God has a plan for everyone, and I wonder if he planned for such events to go on, and their outcome, and my response....then I think about Free Will, and I just get confused - almost to tears - that i cannot make sense of anything going on in my life.

but, one thing's for sure - i can stand in awe still, at the beauty of some of it. (very random, but the moon was gorgeous last nite)

Sunday, July 10, 2005

beautiful surprise, beautiful struggle

so this weekend (beginning thursday, as i had thurs-saturday off) was pretty good. I had orientation, so I'm officially a college of charleston student. Wow, this summer is almost over, isn't it? I got my ID card, my schedule...declared my major (officially...and it's not history anymore) and yeh.

then friday two really great friends from chapel hill came down for the weekend to visit me. Vanessa and Warren. And i'm soo thankful they did. But i think when it was time to leave, I felt a little sad.Leaving chapel hill wasn't that hard - i was busy with RA stuff, checking residents out, people busy with exams and such that you dont have time to muse over the reality and finality of things. then it just sort of washed over me that i wont see them as often anymore.

i have to say that i didn't really expect anyone from chapel hill to visit me - i mean, it's a 5 hour drive. i sort of expected to dissipate into the state of south carolina, chapel hill barely even knowing i was there. so when they said they were coming, i immediately got happy. I mean, here, i dont know anyone past the few guys i've met, and the people i work with - but it's not a relationship where you want to hang out after work hours, you know? so i'm pretty lonely most of the time - working on poetry, reading books, sleeping, working 50 billion hours a week only to give it to my landlord at the end of the month. life is hard. i wondered for a while if i was depressed. i look at how happy and at home i was this weekend while they were here...and i realize i havent found a niche here, and it'll be hard, starting in the middle: in medias res. it sort of made me realize that perhaps i had a niche at chapel hill, i just didn't take advantage of it.

so what do i do for these next two years? how will things turn out? a part of me just wants to finish school, not make any commitments, if i meet people, it happens, if not oh well. i can suck it up for two years then be on my way. but i guess i would at least like to be happy for a little while, for once.

in other news: yeh...my two year time-limit for publishing (other than going the self-publishing route) seems to be more realistic the more i think about query letters and such. and even worse, a lot of people are looking for "poetic dedication" shown through a large publishing curriculum vitae and well, i was published in a high school lit mag, but that i doubt counts as much.

anyways. i have the rest of the day/evening off. who knows what i'll get into.

Saturday, July 02, 2005


smile again. i think i really like this picture. Posted by Picasa


dunno how i feel about that picture...i sort of like my eyes, that's about all i have to say. Posted by Picasa


smile :) Posted by Picasa


i sort of like side pictures when i'm not smiling and not looking into the camera. is that bad? Posted by Picasa


wanted to see the length of my hair Posted by Picasa